My strongest memory of D’s first birthday is the way she ate noodles for the first time with her fingers. We had ventured to an empty open air restaurant the first time in her life, temporarily setting aside worries about Covid. We ordered some steamed vegetables for her, but she was, as expected far more excited in our plates. It was one of the first times she was having food with salt and spices. Beaming with excitement at the new texture and taste, she polished off one noodle at a time with a mischievous smile. And it felt to us like a teeny little foodie was born.
There is such joy in seeing a little human being enjoy something as simple as a new taste, with such unadulterated pleasure. Especially before their palate is overwhelmed with the dizzying array of choices; before they even know what salt and sugar and tastes like; before they know the taste of oil and spice and deep frying and baking soda and butter and chocolate; a time when they sometimes get excited even with the taste of a plain steamed radish.
I was excited to introduce D to food, especially since I never liked food as a child, but became quite a foodie as an adult. I remember avoiding vegetables for no real reason, sitting for hours with a plate of rasam rice till it goes cold, dividing it into smaller portions so that it feels less intimidating, requesting my mother to please let me read a Famous Five on the side and shoving the mouthfuls in. I wasn’t force-fed, but I never thought food was an interesting part of life as a child.
I don’t know what D’s later years are going to be like, but in this one year proven to be quite the opposite baby that I was — as outgoing as I was not, as loud as I was not, as active as I was not, and with a high streak of independence that makes her want to try out all kinds of new food, eat it on her own and thoroughly relish the experience.
Before we started solids, I did some homework. I read a bit online, joined a popular Facebook group, got detailed notes from my pediatrician, asked friends, and like with everything else was bombarded with theories, opinions and specifications. (‘BLW’ or baby led weaning was just one more abbreviation I was to discover in the big bad baby world). And like with everything else, our strategy was take what suits us and our baby, and try not to get overwhelmed by the rest.
So when first solids day arrived, we’d decided to give her mashed carrots as her first food. It seemed to a safe option being a vegetable (so that she apparently wouldn’t get a sweet preference right away), but also not too boring (like radishes or ragi kanji) and also not too ambitious (which I soon realised was big in social media, and I certainly wasn’t going to try avocado and chickpea salad with sugarless chia pudding — what if she never then eats rasam and beans poriyal?!). So armed with bowl and silicon spoon triple washed with hot water, D was seated on the high chair with a bib, and a nearby phone camera.
While we all watched with bated breath and the spoon went into her mouth, she casually swallowed it without any change in expression, as if she was born eating carrots. And yay, D was welcomed into the world of yummies!
I wonder if people commemorated and celebrated every little milestone as we have been doing this past year, more so with working from home. For the early days, every meal was a big step and great fun — she polished off beets, peas, chow chow, sweet potatoes, drumsticks, pumpkins with hardly any reaction. Then, she progressed to bananas (a big fan there, so much so that it became one of her first proper words, a 3-syllable one at that!), apples and a few other fruits that The Very Hungry Caterpillar also eats. I continued to be excited for every new food, comparing detailed notes with a few friends with babies the exact same age on all the new things we tried.
She ate and loved her curd rice making my South Indian stomach heave a huge sigh of relief (more so because the dish has only two ready made ingredients- we can survive!). Her first roti that she stuffed into her mouth herself made my grandmother pronounce her a ‘north Indian’. Her first pasta made my dad declare that she will go study fashion in Milan. Thankfully, her present affinity for easy South Indian staples — dosa, idli and rava upma, gave us hope that we can survive the future with these quick dishes.
I keep telling myself that all this can change any time, when ‘rejection phases’ and ‘appetite drops’ set in (more new words I learnt from the Facebook groups that I choose to pretend I don’t know, the biggest one being ‘sleep regression’!). I know she may suddenly want oats and apples every night, smear dal on her hair (just on the day of a high drama head bath), or fling the whole bowl of palak khichdi across the room (which also does happen occasionally). But mostly, the food goes into the mouth without drama.
I also constantly tell myself we just plain got lucky, and managed to find a balance in what to give her without getting too pressured.
Somehow we could manage a lot of the ‘best practice’ recommendations —sitting at the dining table with no TV or screens or toys or (although I never follow this for myself) books or balcony sights while eating. We try to let her feed herself as much as possible — finger foods at first, and now even the occasional khichdi. And this feels like one of the best decisions, going by her love of doing things on her own as well as our ability to sit with her at the table and finish our meal together. As much as possible, we avoided salt and sweeteners until one year (although there was the occasional festival where D eagerly ate portions of a vadai and rava laddoo). While we’ve kept away biscuits, chocolates and chips and avoided the (gasp!) off-the-shelf cereal mixes that I’ve heard are comparable to junk food, we do use some organic porridge mixes for days when we‘re out of ideas and time.
It’s easier than ever to get caught up in ‘how best to do things’, which can be a never ending battle. Some babies don’t accept foods easily, some families may not have the help and the bandwidth to always prepare fresh food. Sometimes you want quick fixes that don’t need overnight fermentation, or can’t expect other caregivers to do things exactly how you think is ideal, as long is it’s not harmful. And sometimes you can’t sit with a poker face and not be affected when the child refuses more than one mouthful all day.
Research about what’s good for us in food is constantly changing, whether it’s for babies or adults — is maida really such an enemy or is the real culprit rice? Spinach isn’t actually all that healthy, really?! Brown rice is a sham? Does anything remotely processed become junk food? Does organic food exist at all?! It’s pretty great if people manage to make really healthy food choices, but also important to accept our limitations and do the best we can.
As of now — what’s not to enjoy in seeing a 1 year old kick her legs in excitement at the sight of good old vendakkai or brocolli? What’s not to love when the sight of a yelakki banana causes her face to light up followed mini tantrum of ‘I want it right away’, if she doesn’t get it yet? What’s not to be thrilled at (*clutching each other saying we have the smartest baby in the world*) when she spots a papaya while we unpack the shopping and says “pap-paa”? What’s not to admire at when the second she’s told she’s having idli for breakfast, she trots to the kitchen and points to the gas stove? And what’s not to laugh at when she drinks her little glass of plain cow milk (again, something that would almost send me to the bathroom retching) and lick the little milk moustache off with a smile?
What a great time it is to know, that all we need to do is to keep her enjoyably occupied for at least a few minutes is to we keep a plate with broken bits of raisins, so that she’s sitting in one place and not rushing into the kitchen to excavate the dustbin.
I kept thinking as I wrote this that I shouldn’t jinx it by putting this in words, and end up with a very fussy toddler who is hardly likely to have a dinner of avial, curd rice and a little bit of spaghetti pesto as she did tonight. But this is today, and today is good.
At least as of now, we have the cutest little foodie in the world.
